Just Because...: Ghost Town...

Sunday, March 12, 2006

Ghost Town...

This weekend, Mr. Tivo decided to add to my torture and record one of my favorite S&TC eps of all time - Ghost Town. The first time I saw this episode, it brought me to tears. Every woman has ghosts of past relationships. Many women have an Aidan and a Mr. Big in their lives. Many times the women can avoid dealing, but like Samantha said, you must confront the ghost, acknowledge it and it will disappear.

With going home, this is the first trip where I have a sense that something will happen. One never knows who one may encounter. While I get most of the area chatter from my mom who is still living out there, I mostly keep in my little O-Town Bubble and don't sweat it.

On one of my last trips, I went out to dinner with my ex fiancee and let me tell you - that was an adventure. Not only has he not changed (still drinking, out of work, living at his mom's house yet again), but I realized that I *had* changed and was glad for doing so. And with that - the ghost of that past relationship disappeared. To make things even more interesting, as we were sitting and talking, one of my on again/off again exes from high school (we'll call him Mr. Music) actually was seated right behind us.

Many of the same crew I used to go to school with, socialize with, etc. have not left the area. Both Roomie & I were able to break out of Western Mass. Others, well Western Mass was the right fit for them. I know that with B., the subject of A. will most definitely come up and that is one messy situation I am not getting involved with. There will always be unresolved issues between me and A. and I'm content with that. I do not feel like acknowledging that ghost. I also don't want to run into A.'s ex wife who has relocated to Western Mass and lives in the area where I will, more often than not, be.

The one ghost I do deal with on every trip home is that of Nick, the one man who *got* me. He's been dead for god, almost 8 years now and there isn't a day that goes by without my remembering the heartbreak. It's been tough to soldier on, but I've learned to take it day by day. I think after Nick's funeral is the one time that BR saw me break. Tough facade or not, when you lose a piece of your heart, it resonates.

All in all, I think it might be interesting, but I just don't feel like dealing with any more ghostly "issues". I'd like to just release the ghost of my damn past but easier said than done.

Labels: Memories, Random Mess

Posted by Lys :: 12:03 PM :: 0 comments

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Just Because...

Sunday, March 12, 2006