Just Because...: Today was a *Good* Day...

Saturday, December 02, 2006

Today was a *Good* Day...

Today was a day that I thoroughly enjoyed just taking off. While I was going to take the cooking class at Williams-Sonoma today, I thought tomorrow might be best and I can actually chill out. Bec had advised me to get this Homedics Sound Spa so that I can actually *relax* before I sleep. For the past 2 days, I've been trying it out and it drives Shaddy NUTS with the sound of seagulls against the crashing waves. With that, I've learned to turn the TV off at night and it's been working - no chest pains.

Roomie and I signed our "Move Out Notice" today, officially marking the countdown - 61 days from now, I will be moved into a new apt. and I made some appointments for next week. Apartment hunting is hard work - not only to I have to know what side of the *tracks* (per se) the various complexes are (i.e. - in Altamonte, one side of 436 is good, the other side is drug infested; in Orlando - Semoran and Goldrod - hell no and Kirkman is a high crime area as of late), but I also have to make a checklist and try to keep to the rent I'm looking for. My first choice has a waiting list that starts in MAY. Hello - I'm moving in February

There is WAY too much crime in the land of the Rat. I'm really not sure what the hell is going on down here, but BR & Meowmix have their hands full and I need to find out the crime reports for the area. God knows my complex is getting worse by the day and my stupid complex manager insists that there is NEVER any crime here at our apartment complex - DOH. Tell that to the crazy neighbor downstairs who threatened an 8 year old child with a loaded gun and is off his meds.

Sooo, I'm excited about the future. Changes are much needed and, like purging my life of the negative, so goes purging of the space. I'm starting to weed through everything now and decided what I love, what I detest and what goes on Ebay/charity/trash.

As for the family drama, I got a letter from my mother last night, but that was dealt with swiftly. A typed, single space letter, no return address and using my full name - talk about setting off alarms. Halleujah for shredders *LOL*. Seriously - the more emails, letters, etc. that she sends, the more it pushes me away. I'd rather deal with everything on my time and not when it's convenient for her to "explain". There is no explanation needed. The court file will say it all. I've come to the realization that while I once needed and wanted her approval, now I could really care less. She's more concerned with what people think of her and honestly, this is my blog/journal and I refuse to censor anything. As Meowmix, Bec, and Roomie agree - if this is cathargic, then so be it.

What sucks is that when I least expect it, like a dam opening, some memories will hit me from childhood prompting me to make a call and asking my father "did THIS have anything to do with..." It is beyond annoying, so my gal M. at work is giving me a name of a great therapist who I think I need to have a talk with. When I was in high school, I went to see a therapist about dealing with my parents' impending divorce (now i know WHY they stayed together so damn long but still) and I remember during one of the big blow-ups between my mother and I, she said some stuff I thought I had only told my therapist - prompting me to question the integrity of any doctor. However, as pointed out by M., I really can trust doctors and not wonder about client/patient confidentiality. It's going to take time to deal with the revelations and, maybe one day I can have a conversation with my mother, but I don't see it happening in the near future. Like she said, I'm my father's daughter and you know what, I'm pretty proud of that fact.

Posted by Lys :: 8:21 PM :: 0 comments

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Just Because...

Saturday, December 02, 2006