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Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Things have really been irkin' me so, grab that coffee and be prepared to chime in to this month's (well April/May cuz you know I'll forget) "Wha Da Hell - Oh No They Didn't"...

1. While doing a little search for some airline tix, I noticed that Expedia said that certain airlines have a fee for a SECOND CHECKED BAG. The guilty parties: Delta, United, US Airways (who shall now forever be decreed - US Azzways). Are you freakin' kidding me??? OK, it's bad enough that you rake me over the coals for every. little. fee., you are NEVER on time, you always seem to have people with attitudes manning your counters, let's not TALK about lost baggage and your planes have been shown to have "maintenance issues" (here's a tip - make your maintenance guys work for a change, huh? - tell them no shortcuts). There's a reason why I fly AirTran instead of Delta, United and US Azzways namely because of the above. Now, I used to prefer Delta over United and US Azzways but after reading that. Ummm.. Delta - you and I are going to have to break up until you get your crap together. Clearly, it's not me, it's you.
2. The recent flurry of shark bite activity seems to be fueling the local media. We've had the shark attacks on the Florida coast (as we do EVERY year) and every night, every morning, etc. they keep talking about the man who was killed in San Diego by a great white. Around here, the local media is playing it up like "OhMiGod a shark BIT a person" much along the lines of a) it's an infestation or b) how dare they. Maybe someone should throw a reporter IN the water for them to get a FULLY accurate accounting of how the sharks are on the attack. Listen, I look at it as this. How would YOU feel if someone came into YOUR house just la-di-dahin' like they owned it and all that was in the house when really, it was YOUR house. The sharks LIVE in the ocean. It's THEIR house. They eat all that's in it and they can't see too good, ya know. They have to BITE to see if it's edible. And, no disrespect to the guy who got bit and died in Cali and my heart goes out to his family. However, I'm not gonna smack the shark in the nose or shoot him cuz the shark was hungry. Listen, there is a reason WHY I don't go into the water - because one look at my big Irish calves and a tiger shark will think "Mmmmmmm.. lunch WITH leftovers". Anywayz - the local media needs to tone that mess down because people need to be cautious in the water, but we also have to remember we don't own the ocean. The earth does. We're just guests in the fishies house. Sadly, the fish doesn't know better and, unlike a puppy who can be trained, I don't see Jaws being as cooperative.
3. Buddy Dyer - you are on my radar again, and this time Buddy, it's not good. I've given you a pass lately and, while we're still not "buddies", I stopped sneering at your life-size effigy in City Hall's walkway. I stopped ridiculing it to my friends as how you were dressed up for various events/seasons/etc. I even, gasp, started to soften towards you after reading that fluff piece in Orlando Magazine about how much of a great guy you were blah blah blah. I thought "Maybe, Lys, you are just giving him a bad rap - he can't be ALL that bad if so and so are buddies with him". Then I got caught in the insane traffic this morning FOR NO REASON only to see we've got more construction again. Listen, I'm sure you have a thing for Tonka trucks and all but can we do construction on construction times for the highway - like ummm... not during RUSH HOUR. I didn't like being 28 min. late this morning because you wanted to let more construction go on. And do you know that many of those construction peeps are often NOT working when we drive past? It's either a movie set mentality with the hurry up and wait or they need an extraordinary amount of coffee breaks. I'm starting to see why Fred Flintstone must have worked for the FDOT back in the day. And if you really want to remind us transplants of traffic ala up north (i.e. Boston, Philly, NYC), you definitely achieved that goal this morning.
4. To the cabbies protesting outside of City Hall yesterday - I hope you got what you wanted. But screaming "JUSTICE - We Want JUSTICE" so loud in my ear makes me think someone got arrested or was detained unlawfully or hurt. I thought y'all were striking over money, working conditions, etc within the City Beautiful aka Orlando. And to those on the sidelines SITTING DOWN IN THE SHADE - the purpose of a strike is to PROTEST not RELAX. I do see, however, that you were front and center marching during the video but sitting down all the other times I was outside or was looking down at y'all. Ahhh... perhaps that was the justice y'all were seeking. Jus' sayin'.
5. SL brought up this issue for the HotDog people, and by that classification, I mean those that make the hotdogs and those that make the hotdog buns. Hotdog + Bun = Complete Hot Dog, right? So, to quote SL, why are there 10 hot dogs in a pack and only 8 hot dog BUNS? You are either going to have too many hotdog buns or too few hot dog buns. Because if you plan on making 10 hot dogs, you either need to wrap 2 in lettuce leaves or serve them bunless. However, my gal at work, we'll call her Samantha, countered SL's thoughts and stated that sometimes she thinks there should be two hotdogs in the bun because there is so much bun and so little hot dog. She has to compensate for the overabundance of bread and she won't have the extra 2 leftover hotdogs. Then again, as she said, there are never enough hot dogs. (I don't think the actual hot dog was on her mind by that point. Again, reference the name and that describes her to a T.)
6. To the Oil Companies and State Senators: I'm hereby proposing that every person call/write/email their state senators and tell them that they are personally holding them responsible for the gas prices. Democrat/Republican - it doesn't matter. The senators need to figure out what the heck to do as the J.R. Ewings are laughing all the way straight to the bank. Hell, if the government can give us $600 per person to spend to "help the economy", why not REALLY help the economy and lower the damn gas. So, to make it easy for you - here's a link that gives you the phone/email/contact form for your rep. Be civil but be authoritative. You helped get them their job and, as The Godfather decreed "Someday, and that day may never come, [your constituent will] call upon you to do a service...". In Florida, Senator Mel Martinez and Senator Mel Martinez will be held responsible for the insanity of our government. It is up to them to communicate Florida's displeasure with the rising insane gas prices. And if that doesn't work, I say the government doesn't need $40 hammers (recycle the ones they have dangnabit!) and can start buying some oil or something to help its country out.

Again, like I said - just my opinions. I'm curious to hear your thoughts. Leave 'em in the comments.

*jumps off soapbox*

Labels: Blog 365, Soapbox, Wha Da Hell

Posted by Lys :: 6:47 PM :: 3 comments

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