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Thursday, April 08, 2010

Marvelling At The Brilliance...

Man, my day has been quite the active one today...

I have been having quite the time getting Sir Wiggy up in the morning for his morning constitutionals. It's a vast difference since when he first lived with me - that boy was up at 5 or 6 a.m. ready to greet the world. Come 7:30 I'm shaking him awake gently and he's looking at me with that vacant glare like "Momma, puleaze - I iz seeps!" At 7:45, I'm shaking him again and his reply - he rolls over. At 8:00, that's it - he's got 10 minutes to run outside and pee or I am late for work. He gets up begrudgingly like how dare I wake the king from his slumber and trots out to the living room to see where the cat is. Then he remembers "OH Door is at end of hall." and he slooooooowly trots down to the doorway while I'm walking behind him going "Wiggy - you are dilly-dallying - MOVE IT!" My neighbors must think I'm nuckin' futz, I swear.

So this morning was yet another round of "Wiggy Wake Up!" and it set me behind on my schedule a bit. Fine, no Starbucks drive by would be possible as I grabbed a diet coke for the road. As I'm heading to the 9to5, my GPS tells me there is a back road that will shave 15 min. off my commute. GREAT! Not only would I be early, but that also would mean that I don't have to deal with the senile Conshohocken police officer and his sidekick dopey crossing guard who hold up traffic without fail every. single. day. [The two stooges only let one car at a time through the intersection (and it's a two lane highway - figure Car A waits while Car B goes - then the cop lets a ton of cars out from the cross street and then Car A can go while Car C has to wait - it's a NIGHTMARE) as Officer Dipstick marches through traffic looking in cars for seatbelt. offenders].

I take the shortcut and am movin' right along - 10 min. down the road, I see this HUGE sign looming in front of me that says "ROAD CLOSED."

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?!?

So I make a u-turn and head back up the huge street to the main road and thankfully there was another back way in. However, still I was way behind schedule. *UGH!* "Brilliance, Lys, Sheer Friggin' Brilliance!" I griped as I mentally slapped myself upside the head ala Gibbs from NCIS.

Cutting to lunch hour, I had to run to the King of Prussia mall to Borders to pick up an updated AP Stylebook and got there in record time. YAY! I figured things were turning my way - until I decide in yet another fit of brilliance that I'd grab a coffee from Starbucks down the hall instead of going through McD's drive through when I got back near the office. That would be a wonderful plan if only the Barista knew how to multi-task. The man had 4 coffee orders and could only methodically mix one at a time while ogling some mall rat girls (Don't they have school?!?!). Well, 15 min. later for my venti iced non-fat caramel macchiato, I had to run like the wind to get into Borders and grab the book which was buried in the vast back of the store and race back to the car. UGH! Again with another mental slap to the head as I hightailed it back to work.

Seriously, these ideas of brilliant time saving have to stop or I just need the Rabbit from Alice in Wonderland to keep me on schedule.

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Posted by Lys :: 6:43 PM :: 0 comments

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Sunday, February 21, 2010

Yay or Nay: Couture Pop

I keep seeing this “Couture Pop” everywhere and when I saw it was $22.00 I went “DA HELL?!?!”  Sure, it’s a cute girlie girl novelty but would you spend $22 for a bedazzled lollipop?

Celebrity Branding at it’s finest. *sigh*

CouturePop

(Photo courtesy of SugarFactory)

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Posted by Lys :: 1:36 AM :: 4 comments

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Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Dreamin’….

Remember that track from Will to Power – Dreamin’?  I have to say that EVERY time I hear it, I flash back to the 80s and remember days on the set, my Philly crew (when they (and I) were young, etc. etc. etc.  However, the song also reminds me of my days at Annie's when I was just out of college as well because Chris, the DJ, used to play it CONSTANTLY.

Anywhooo – onto the subject of dreams… My friends crack up at times because I will have a dream, wake up and go “Holy Crap” and not in a good way.  I often joke about it being “Indian/Irish Intuition” but I know when I have dreams about certain people in my life, often I will check on them to make sure they are okay.  It’s how I found out that EJ was in the hospital,  that A. was getting married (don’t ask!), etc. 

Yesterday, I had the WEIRDEST dream – and I don’t know if it was motivated by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer (shush – Marc Blucas reminds me of BR in the worst way) or possibly someone bringing BR up to me a few days prior, but one of the main characters was BR.  And it wasn’t good.  I can’t go into particulars but I knew that something was up and I couldn’t figure out what it was.  And BR was trying to shield me from whatever the situation was. 

Luckily, I caught BR on chat and he was fine.  He joked with me asking if he “expired” in the dream and, quite frankly, last I checked he wasn’t a gallon of milk or somethin’ (jus’ playin’ Brenn!) but I had to laugh.  I basically brushed it off and called it a day.

Well, BR has often cautioned me on jumping into things feet first but he also is one to push me to achieve my goals.  The sense of foreboding of earlier rang true when my phone rang and on the other end was MB going “OK – what is your airport now that you’ll fly out of.  You have a gig to promote.”  I protested to no avail (new possible job; the dog; what the heck am I going to WEAR?!?!?!) and I accepted the reality – I’m diving head first back into PR for a brief moment.  It’s a big project that I can’t really announce just yet but when I can, I’ll disclose to y’all first!

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Posted by Lys :: 2:22 AM :: 0 comments

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Monday, January 18, 2010

Sometimes You Just Need To Shake Your Head…

This morning, after picking up those dreaded Girl Scout Cookies for my father, I decided to drop by Ross to see what they had in terms of kitchen goodies (not a whole heck of a lot – ehhhh).  Anywhooo, as I’m checking out, I’m asked if I wanted to donate to their charity of choice – the American Heart Association.  Hmmmm… if it was the Red Cross I would especially with the Haiti situation but right now, I didn’t think the AHA was worth it at the moment. 

Dontcha know this fuddy duddy older woman decided to interject her own two cents and tell me how corrupt Haiti was, how we’ve given them billions of dollars in aid before and now we aren’t going to help them until they prove where that money went.  Plus, she felt it wasn’t needed at the moment.

HOLD UP – WHAT DID SHE SAY?

I whipped around and (sorry Mom) I know I’m supposed to respect my elders but dayum, ignorance and stupidity is not tolerated, especially around me.  I knew she was about to launch into the usual b.s. I would often hear down south and I gave her that look – you know the one where I let you know to hold your tongue and asked her with an attitude “What News Are YOU Watching – Pat Robertson?” 

The woman got all flustered and said “No, All of the news channels are reporting this”.  Hmmmm, news to me and I DO watch the news and normally this wouldn’t escape my attention.  Haiti needs our help, PERIOD!  Just seeing the images makes me want to jump on a plane and fly down there to help.

Well, I let her have it – I do not tolerate bullshit.  Plus, how could she not see that the young girl that was waiting on me spoke with a Creole or Haitian accent and was visibly upset.  I apologized to the salesgirl for my outburst to the woman grasping with senility but the fact remains, People need help. I honestly don’t give a damn about the political bullshit – HUMAN BEINGS ARE IN PAIN.  Leave the political preaching at the door and reach out to your neighbor and help, no matter how much or how little. 

Sorry, I’m jumping off my soapbox now but damn that woman got me HEATED!!!!

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Posted by Lys :: 11:59 PM :: 1 comments

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Tuesday, December 01, 2009

Update On The Stupidity That Is DirecTV...

I'm one for finding a resolution - I don't want to hear excuses or the blame game b.s. Let's just fix whatever problem we're having. I tend to apply that theory to everything in my life. Sadly, DirecTV doesn't subscribe to that theory and the amount of b.s. and lip service I've heard from that company astounds me - seriously, how did I ever tolerate them for 6 years.

I gave them a drop dead deadline to hear from them by close of business last Tuesday - when did they call - Wednesday afternoon. And the email they sent me was b.s. as well - advising to call one of their 800 numbers. Seriously - are you kidding me? First problem - they don't hit a deadline and then push it off on the customer.

I went through the holiday weekend thinking "Fine - I'll deal with the situation at the beginning of the week" because I have some serious letters that need to be sent to the FTC, FCC, Better Business Bureaus & the Attorney Generals of both Florida & California. Those letters take serious thought. Also, contrary to their "yes you need to send them back/no you don't need to send them back" mixed messages re: the converters, I have to incur additional expense, labor etc in shipping these converters back to them which entails inventorying of each converter, remote, access card, etc., writing another letter to their inventory control department, cc'ing their general counsel on everything, etc. In short, a basic "Here's your ****, don't ever contact me again" breakup letter - but, of course, a bit more legally verbose.

In my theory of "Let's just be done with this", as I was in the midst of preparing the requisite cranky "Trusting My Position Is Clear" letters, I made the mistake of actually taking their call Monday afternoon.

My reaction to the b.s. on their end - are you EFFIN KIDDING ME?

This service MANAGER - Rachel - had the nerve to tell me that DirecTV does, indeed, maintain the right to keep ANY credit card their customer uses and reserves the right to charge out at will for balances due. If you currently have them, know that they have this in the super fine print.

Even better - while I was paid through Sept. 15th, I am obligated to pay through Nov. 15th because while one of their CSRs from one of their many call centers in whatever country didn't follow procedure. To drive the point home, Rachel made the comment that they will charge out my account for the full amount. Well, then you'll be dealing with USAA again. USAA is wise to the b.s. and DirecTV is on their radar - not in a good way.

For the amount of trouble I'm having to go through to cancel each and every credit card EVER used with DirecTV - seriously, I should bill them an hourly rate. Thank god USAA is handling it on my end with the dispute and, should DirecTV try to bill again, then it's on. Not to mention, those letters are going out this week to the AGs and the appropriate government agencies and their converters will be shipped back. Should ANYTHING come up on my credit report - hell hath no fury. Also, as a sidenote - to the Plaintiff's attorney that's got a federal suit pending against DirecTV, don't worry, you'll get a copy of my letter as well.

Rachel - note for future use - when your senior VP of communications forwards you a blog post and email for answering - (a) note the deadline and (b) READ THE ENTIRE BLOG FOR FOLLOW UP POSTS. See, if you had, you would have seen that Laura and I had it worked out and you just blew it right up AGAIN.

As expected, DirecTV doesn't know how to correctly follow through ANYTHING (or you would have hit the deadline by Tuesday evening). Boo on me for actually (A) taking your call; (B) giving you a chance to speak and (C) for actually believing that you, as a company, could come correct. Guess after 6 years, I really didn't know you AT all.

DirecTV - EPIC fail - seriously, I do hope that Comcast and DISH TV teach you one hell of a lesson - especially in customer retention. I'm loyal to a fault and, quite frankly, I should have left you a long time ago.

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Posted by Lys :: 6:52 AM :: 2 comments

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Tuesday, November 24, 2009

More DirecTV Stupidity...

Did you know that DirecTV:

  • Retains EVERY credit card you ever used with them and will charge them out accordingly as they see fit.  (Note to self:  CANCEL EVERY CARD EVER USED!)
  • While they often will tell you that the equipment is yours, it is not.
  • If you pay for the DVR at Best Buy, it's not your equipment - it's still theirs.  Therefore, you are out $200.00.
  • You need to return the equipment after you cancel or you will be charged after the final disconnect.
  • They can send you boxes to return equipment that you will be billed for the shipment for OR you can pay for it yourself and know that it got there.  (Thankfully I was a cable wench so I will do an equipment inventory to include with it).
  • You can't dispute the charge until you START UP NEW SERVICE (boy did that situation make me laugh)
  • will often route you to an overseas call center where you will get conflicting stories about the situation.
  • When you get back into the States, you will often get a rude gal who won't note the account and will force you to lose your daggone mind asking for a manager.
  • Customer Care cannot help a gal at all - I now have to go through the Billing Dispute Department, the Office of the General Counsel and a ton of other hoops.

I'm happy to report that after 4 hours of my life that I will never get back, constant repeating of my story again, and again, and again, howls for a MANAGER v. Supervisor, etc., it took ONE LONE Supervisor, Ms. Laura, who apparently was no stranger to this mess and probably has heard it all before.  She gave me the requisite addresses and told me that there is nothing she can do - it's in the offices of the Billing Dispute department and the General Counsel.  She also is sending me a final bill - turns out I was paid up through Sept. 15th when I paid on Sept. 4th and the $141.65 should have never been billed.  No kidding Sherlock!

One bright note, USAA has been a godsend in this drama and are helping me through the ramifications.  As much as I whined about the cable install upon moving here, I could hug Comcast right now.  I am a stickler for brand loyalty and I will NEVER leave USAA and Comcast and I will be BFF from hereon out.

Monday - I have tons of letters to write to the Attorney General in Florida & California, the Better Business Bureau, the FTC and the FCC about the DirecTV drama.  DirecTV's in-house counsel's assistant will be none too pleased at the amount of paperwork coming their way.

DirecTV - we're done.  There is no Ross/Rachel break - lose my phone number, lose my name and, yes, GIVE ME MY MONEY BACK!

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Posted by Lys :: 3:36 PM :: 3 comments

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DirecTV: MASSIVE FAIL!

Here's the story of a girl who moved and the company who didn't cancel the gal's cable service when directed to.

Remember how I was in the midst of a massive work project right up until the move.  Well, during my very few minutes of downtime, I made all the move arrangements - canceling Electric, Telephone AND Satellite TV.  I also arranged new service of electric, gas, telephone and cable to the Philly apartment.  Now I'm a smart gal and I will toot my own horn thankyouverymuch.  However, guess what I find out when reconciling my bank accounts - DirecTV took it upon themselves to charge out $141.65 to my bank account for service up until NOVEMBER!  What the @*@*!*!*!  They "disconnected service"   Well - DOH - that should have been done in SEPTEMBER WHEN I ORDERED IT, specifically SEPTEMBER 15th! 

I call today and speak with two very competent CSRS who seem to have the right info and immediately get me over to the proper manager after holding for 23 minutes.  I'm routed to a Marie/Mae or whatever she wants to call herself and this gal has the NERVE to tell me "Well I need to see what's disputed".  HELLO - the whole effin' amount. I should have only paid a prorated amount for 11 days since my last payment on September 4th.  

So - smartazz Mae tells me "You work in law - you can send us a formal dispute correspondence to our PO Box and they can handle it from there."  First of all, yes, I do work in Law - so that means I want a signature and someone to hold liable for receiving the correspondence or a fax number.  See, when you inevitably will drop the ball again, I want someone's head.  I'm not stupid.  And then, compounding the drama, Mae snottily remarks, "Well there IS an early termination fee"  Early termination my butt!  I MOVED and I had been a DirecTV customer for over 4 years.  Hell, now that I think about it - I think it was close to 5 or 6 years.

Manager Mae turns out to SUPERVISOR Mae and clearly has a chip on her shoulder.  That chip got worse when she was told to find someone higher than her - even after angrily remarking "There's no manager available!"  Well, FIND ONE because I don't believe that Mae was the highest in the food chain on that call center floor.  Turns out I was right and, on the line comes April - a manager.  April is just as frustrated as me because DirecTV won't give them an address or fax number of the dispute idiots.  Plus their website is down so finding a legal contact is impossible.  So, after much apologizing, she and I were calmly trying to find an adequate resolution and after she put me on hold for another 7 minutes to see what she could do, I hear her come back on the line with "Ms. Lys" and then the dreaded DISCONNECT. 

ARG!!!!!!!  ARE YOU FREAKIN' KIDDING ME?

So I have to call back - and start to tell my story for the 4th time and, CSRs - take note - NEVER tell a customer "I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL!" because that is when I lost it - throat was ripped out at the unfortunate CSR who uttered that phrase and I told him - "FIND APRIL or a MANAGER.  Do not, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD put me back in touch with MAE!"

And, after 17 minutes, KEVIN a SUPERVISOR gets on the phone and - yet again - DISCONNECT as he's speaking. 

I finally had a come to Jesus chat with Joanne, a very sweet CSR and told her that if a manager doesn't get on the line soon, I'm about to go to the executives with this drama because DirecTV should have NEVER pulled this crap in the first place.  I know they are all about customer retention but c'mon already - I MOVED and into a COMCAST footprint.  I CANCELLED MY SERVICE.  

Again, I was put on hold and subsequently routed to a ROSE in some call center in the Philippines.  SO I had to go through the arguing AGAIN.  Even better was Rose telling me "Well, you get routed to managers all over the world".  So, the bell in my head goes off - we're dealing with outsourcing (you know how I detest companies that doe that).  And as she remarks "Well we mailed you a hard copy bill on Sept. 17th and Oct. 17th.  You know how the mail system is"  Well "ROSE", the mail system in my country - while not perfect - knows a FORWARDING ADDRESS plus I gave it to DIRECTV's girl on Sept. 4th when she tried to get me to stay with the company.  However Rose tells me that the note was only about payment and not the disconnect.  Now irate and boiling, I insisted on transferring to a manager in the states.  And, again during the transfer - you guessed it - a disconnect.  And their website is down and their office is closed now until the morning. 

However, know that in the AM, I will have a nice chat with USAA who will be made aware of this drama and a request for reversal of the charge will be put in if need be because I did NOT authorize DirecTV to use my debit card on November 16th, nor was authorization implied for ANY future use when I made a payment with said card on Sept. 4th.  And I will have a chat with the people in the DirecTV US offices when they open for the correct info as well as a hard copy of the bills.  And the legal dispute will begin because, as I was only supposed to be billed for 11 days of service, by their error and oversight, I was charged for 2 MONTHS of service.  Somehow 11 days does not equal $141.65.

Also, DirecTV - EPIC fail because for someone who always touted how great you were even during the hurricanes, your customer service - horrid.  For something so simple as a disconnect, your people couldn't even do that right. 

This fight is FAR from over...

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Posted by Lys :: 1:29 AM :: 1 comments

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Wednesday, November 11, 2009

The One Where My [Driving] Past Resurfaces...

You know my theory of "don't put it out there" or "don't think about it" or "stop thinking about it because you know if you focus on something, it's gonna happen".  Well, it's happened - I got a flat tire in Philly.

See, being up north they have a nasty thing called potholes.  You know that daggone Geico commercial where the pothole has a "discussion" with a tire that it kicked the crap out of?

Take a sec and watch...

Doesn't that pothole remind you of Britney Spears?  Well, I digress.

I might have mentioned that back in college A. & B. often came to this gal's rescue because potholes and I are not friends in ANY way - and the amount of tires I went through was epic (at least for me).  It was the running joke and one that I wasn't too proud of.  I can change a tire but I reason that AAA can do that (and don't get me started on the AAA south club - They won't transfer my membership to Philly until renewal NEXT SEPTEMBER!) Stilettos are NOT made for changin' tires ;)

I thought recently that "Gee Lys, you haven't had any flat tires recently - thank god!"  Well, then that stupid commercial has been on repeat on the networks.  And that commercial reminds me often of the college tire trauma - thereby making me think about flat tires often.  Not good.

I had a meeting in Center City this a.m. and I decided that I should leave an hour or so early and, as I'm backing out of the parking space I hear "SCREEEEEEEEECCCCCHHHHHHH" and thought "WTH?!?" as I jumped out of the car to be greeted by a flat tire.  These were BRAND NEW TIRES that were purchased in September - what the #*!@*@#*#@*!*!*#*@

Turns out there was a screw on the sidewall so I had to get another whole new tire (thanks Goodyear on Ridge Ave - Love those guys!) but damn - and I'm sure that there was a pothole somewhere that was laughing and junk...

Welcome to Philly, right?

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Posted by Lys :: 7:36 PM :: 2 comments

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Wednesday, November 04, 2009

Barnes & Noble.com: EPIC FAIL!

First of all, can I tell you how red in the face I am - seriously I'm livid.  It's my birthday for cryin' out loud and I shouldn't have to wage war AGAIN with Barnes & Noble's inept customer service center for their idiocy.

Some background.  I've been a loyal B&N customer for YEARS.  I've held the membership faithfully.  I buy a TON of books, DVDs, etc.  I often enjoy the website's interviews, etc. and make a point to buy all my magazines there.  Needless to say they make a good sum of funds off me.  I've noticed that recently my orders have been *ahem* shall we say slow.  Now one of the perks of buying a certain amount online is "Free Super Saver Shipping" which you could set your clock by - 3 business days or so and *boom* it's in my hands.  Which is great like when I want to review Jaden's fabu new cookbook "Steamy Kitchen" and I am looking forward to the UPS guy knocking on the door with that gorgeously shot book (yes I leafed through a copy in the store - I couldn't wait).  I also ordered the Foodie Handbook by the one and only Pim.  Can we say I'm crazy stoked about both of these books - both of which I put back in anticipation of the order coming to my mailbox. 

Well - it's two weeks later and, guess what - not one but TWO orders are "lost in the mail".  That's my original order AND the order that they issued as a replacement for the first one that is "M.I.A" from a distribution center in NEW JERSEY - the next flippin' state over.

When I called with concern at the end of the week last week to find out what the heck is going on because well, you just can't get tracking from their inept distributor ARGIX DIRECT, they informed me that there were a few complaints and that the replacement would ship out via UPS to me from now on as I'm a member who has been with them for years.  The B&N operator was very understanding and also told me that she was having problems personally with this dumb as rocks (my description - NOT hers) ARGIX DIRECT.   She assured me it would ship out post haste and I again waited patiently for the little present to come to the door.  Now, mind you my Sephora order came and that I ordered SUNDAY NIGHT via UPS.  The UPS here in Philly rocks!  Love them (which, if you know me is quite the event because UPS in Orlando and New Hampshire seriously sucked!)

Well, I get an email from B&N which tells me that it reshipped my replacement order and *wait for it* it went via ARGIX DIRECT via US MAIL.  AGAIN - from New Jersey - next state over.  Shipped out and *boom* guess what - it's lost in the mail again and we can't find ANY tracking info for it because B&N and/or ARGIX dropped the flippin' ball.  What happened to "Ms. Lys - we're going to ship it to you ASAP through UPS so you won't have this problem again"

Needless to say, I lost my patience today when I had to talk to this gal "Cecile" or whatever who not only told me my address was wrong (newsflash - I changed it immediately when I moved and it's on all my receipts so check your flippin' screen dummy because the gal prior to you knew the right address) and then told me "ohhh - it's got to be lost".  When I told her I just renewed my membership and I wanted it canceled and refunded - no go.  She begrudgingly refunded my order cost for both books and I told her that we're having a hell of a breakup.  This is no Ross/Rachael Friends Breakup - this is the real deal as in don't call me, don't email me, lose my damn number we are O.V.E.R.  Seriously - OVER.  Which is sad and hurts me deeply because I really did love going to B&N and browsing the aisles.  Now, it's all Borders & Borders.com which is 20 min. out of the way for me but to prove my point, I'll do it. 

So Barnes & Noble - I don't believe a word of what you say anymore.  Clearly, while I know you are "cutting costs" by using this supposedly cheaper ARGIX DIRECT service, you just lost a very loyal (and profitable) customer.  I've put up with your lack of changing magazines, lack of stock in the Plymouth Meeting Store, etc. because to me B&N has been a part of my shopping loyalty since I was in college.  I just can't sit by and say "Oh it's okay" because really it's not.  What you are doing to customers is disappointing.  So, here's where I tell you publicly (and my readers) - do NOT buy the membership - it's not worth it.  And, that's money I will never see again but I'm sure you will need that $25 because you will lose more customers than me by year's end if you keep this inept shipping distributor.  Clearly, ARGIX has proved itself to be useless in my eyes not once but TWICE.  Go figure.

So excuse me while I head over to BORDERS to go buy the Foodie Handbook and Steamy Kitchen at FULL PRICE because, you know what, Borders has NEVER did me wrong like you have Barnes & Noble.  And I'm sure they will welcome my business (and wallet) with open arms.

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Posted by Lys :: 6:15 PM :: 2 comments

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Thursday, October 15, 2009

Adventures At The Social Security Office...

One of my issues in trying to become a legal responsible resident of Pennsylvania includes getting a proper drivers' license.  Granted my Florida one doesn't expire until 2010, however per Commonwealth rules, you must have a new license within 60 days of establishing residency.  Easy Peasy - right?  WRONG!  The Commonwealth of Pennsylvania doesn't make it so simple as turning in your new license and showing your lease/bill/etc. to show you live here - they also demand your Social Security Card be shown.  Ummmm... however, much like the title to my car, the SS Card is MISSING!  I'm sure I'll find it when I've gotten my replacement but I haven't seen it in years since I moved to Orlando. *sigh*

The only way to get the replacement card is to make a visit to my local SSA Office closest to my address.  The one that the SSA sent me to was in the heart of Germantown.  For those of you that aren't familiar with the Philly landscape, Germantown is not a favorable area - my gal Suz is a police officer in that district and the stories she tells me "Oh we had a stabbing/There was a shooting/Oh I have to testify at a murder trial" blah blah blah.  You get the picture.  Suz is in court almost every day and at night she's patrolling the streets of Germantown.  Needless to say, when I was looking for an apartment, Suz was the one to yay or nay a place.

So, my dad joked that I should go earlier in the morning because "the riff raff are still sleeping".  Sure - not a problem.  I figured it would be simple and that would be it.  4 hours later, my viewpoint on society has changed.  I'm now convinced that I need to channel my inner Suze Orman and save for my retirement because I am convinced there will be NOTHING for me when I retire.  The conversations I heard were such perfect blog fodder that I figured you might enjoy/shake your head or start praying for society as a whole...

I'm convinced that a day at the SSA is like a prison lunchroom with people trading tips on how to best the system.  Now, before we get "political", let me just say that I have friends who have been on the system and have used it to help when they were in a tough spot and now they are on their own.  That's not the point of this post.  I fully support the system for those that need it. 

However, I was privy to a conversation to two women who were quite loud and that I have never been so thankful to hear my number called so I could leave them without telling both of them to "grow the eff up".  One of the woman, a badly bottled blonde, couldn't have been more than 26.  She would only work 15 hours a week so she couldn't lose her SSA benefits.  According to her, she's bi-polar and couldn't work more than 15 hours because of that.  To make it even more "head shake worthy", she wouldn't accept responsibility for losing her prior job because she was caught SMOKING CRACK when she should have been teaching.  She was a headstart teacher in Northeast Philly.  Ummmmm..  The other woman is "diabetic" and she couldn't work because she had diabetes therefore she needed a SSA check while her boyfriend who wasn't her husband had a good paying job.  Are you effin' kiddin' me?  Seriously.  There was a woman to the right of me who decided she would just change her baby's diaper in full view of everyone where the baby let out a howl and a half because, well it was COLD.  There were people who go there daily and it was like a lunchroom catch up with everyone.  There were retired veterans who actually NEEDED benefits that people wouldn't move to let them sit.  The sense of entitlement that was around the room just pissed me the hell off.  And when my number was called out of order to get my replacement card, I heard people chattering behind me going "That ain't fair.  They should call my number."  I almost turned around to tell her "Bitch PLEASE - I'm here for a replacement card - NOT TO MILK THE SYSTEM like your funky azz".  And the people that work there - there was one woman who needed to be "retrained" as she copped major attitude with everyone, kept taking breaks and I'm convinced she was on the internet or something as she would wait before taking another person - no initiative.  There were 4 windows and only two open.  Boy was I thankful that after the 3.5 hour that they opened up a third window.

I do believe that there are people who are disabled and need SSA benefits.  However, I don't feel that bipolar, depression and diabetes counts as reasons to not work.  If you take your meds, there is hope, right?  I can say that never again will I ever go to the SSA Germantown office and, quite frankly, I'm now convinced that society has "issues."

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Posted by Lys :: 1:38 PM :: 1 comments

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Monday, July 06, 2009

Sometimes You Just Have to Pay Attention...

I've had so much going on in the day to day that I've just been caught up like a working drone - work; home; pug; chores - over and over again. This weekend was the first time in a while I really chilled out after the chaos and really relaxed.

Well, somehow last night I had the weirdest dream about A. The dream involved him needing to talk to me about something important and he couldn't since Meowmix was blocking him from contacting me. Somehow, he and I chatted and all was fine. I can't remember the specifics of the conversation but all and all, it was one of those types of dreams that I woke up thinking "Da Hell?!?!?!" Not to mention that it is quite rare to even have a dream with A. in it plus remember it the next morning. When that happens, my instinct kicks in and I know that something is up.

Well, totally random - this morning I get the news that he's getting married in a couple months. He's marrying someone who also works for the same PD as him and understands his lifestyle (totally different than his last wife who would beg me to try to convince him to work a office 9-5. The man wanted to be a police officer ever since we first met so no, he'd never trade in his badge for a desk.)

In chatting with Meowmix, she also agreed that the timing of the dream and the info was peculiar to say the least but it showed me one thing - not only has he moved on but so have I. It goes without saying that I am beyond happy for the cat and his new bride. If she makes him happy, then all is right in my book. He has been through hell.

It also shows me that yet another chapter of my past is finished and only the best is ahead.

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Posted by Lys :: 6:00 PM :: 0 comments

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Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Feeling Jaded...

You know what's sad - knowing how badly the entertainment biz manipulates the media to promote whatever they have going on. Some things that have me going "ARRUUUU" and realizing that there's a publicist at work doing anything to "get ink". I can say with certainty that I don't follow the mantra of "Any Publicity is Good Publicity" and, when I would hear potential clients talk about it like "Oh lets do XYZ and then leak it to the press", well then - that's a ship I don't want to assist. So when I hear some stuff in the media, my eyes get a hell of a workout from all the eye rolling and sighing and "Oh puleaze... what the hell". I do giggle when I read some sites because, let's face it, they are paid for scandal and b.s. Heidi & Spencer from the Hills - stars? Really? For what? If anything, they manipulate the media. Not to mention all the celebs with "paparazzi shots" that are clearly staged for attention. Again - oh brother.

So, let's take a peek at some of the breaking headlines this week:
  • Real Housewives of NYC's Countess is getting divorced - news breaks today - when she's beginning her book tour. Hmmmmm.
  • More Housewives b.s. with other housewives getting threatened either by "non-boyfriend" or otherwise. Wait - contract decisions and season decisions being made by Bravo Suits to see if it's worth the interest. Hmmmmm.
  • ATL Housewives fighting, more b.s. etc. while filming - drumming up ATL interest because that show is a hot funky fried mess. Hmmmmm....
  • LeeAnn Rhimes and her "co-star" Eddie Cibrian both getting caught in an alleged "cheating scandal". Convenient that it "breaks" right before their Lifetime Movie premiere. Personally, I think many people wouldn't give a crap about Eddie Cibrian but LeeAnn - oh let me tune in and see that movie. Hmmmm... I would guess that someone at the network might have leaked that mess. *insert eye roll*
  • Sham-Wow guy was arrested for beating the crap out of a hooker, allegedly in Miami - Spokesperson says that the companies he endorses won't remove the infomercials. Hmmm.. sales must be down - or a competitor must be hot on the heels.
  • Kendra from Playboy's Girls Next Door is releasing a "stripper pole & workout" much along the lines of Carmen Electra (Original much! *snort*) but - wait for it - she's promoting a reality show that will be following her during her "engagement and wedding plans". Hmmm... she's really gonna marry that cat - Ummmm. I'll believe it when I see an actual wedding license. Til then I'll lump it with all the other "reality" shows.
  • Speaking of Girls Next Door - Holly Breaks a Rib; wait Holly Fractured a Rib; wait Holly might have bruised a rib. Wait - Holly is playing the sympathy vote so as to not get voted off Dancing with the Stars... Hmmmm
  • JLo's wearing her wedding ring - JLo looks great. JLo's got a handbag line - wait. JLo is the QUEEN of manipulating the media. Moving on...

Reminds me of that old saying that I used to hear - believe nothing of what you hear and only half of what you see. So, if you excuse me, I need to catch up on some fiction reading - where's the US Magazine...

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Posted by Lys :: 6:56 PM :: 4 comments

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Thursday, March 12, 2009

Like Totally, OhMiGah!

People, apparently I no longer live in an "upscale apartment home community". I now live in a dorm. I thought my WNEC/DumbPath days were long ago.

While I've blogged before about the idiot golf students that live on the first floor of my building, apparently their campus now lives here. We have three recent move-ins - all college students. Not to mention the influx of students I noticed hanging out on balconies this evening, on cells in front of apartment buildings and others coming in from a hard day of classes golfing, clubs thrown casually in their sassy convertibles bearing tags from Massachusetts, New York, Connecticut, and Jersey. And while I love seeing Northern Peeps here in the south, I detest interacting with young idiots and, truth be told, I'm now surrounded by them and being held hostage.

If this is our future generation, I'm really scared.

:::sigh::: Yes, I know - I'm feelin' my age. Someone pass me a cardigan and a cane while I sit on the porch and call the Altamonte Police incessantly. Grandma here needs her sleep.

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Posted by Lys :: 7:24 PM :: 4 comments

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Sunday, January 25, 2009

Poetic Justice...

So I get a call today from Bec, who I haven't heard from in a while. I always crack up whenever we talk because she just tells it LIKE IT IS. One of the most down to earth, straight in your face wing gals ever! Even when we go out, if a guy tells me that he wants my number and tells me he can't give me his, she'll straight up tell him: "So, you're married, live with a girl or something?" Nothing is off limits.

Anywhoo - she calls me to tell me that she just was shopping in the Wal-Hell in Northampton and, lo and behold, who works there but my ex - the azzhat Mark.

Not that it surprises me - well, let me take it back - him WORKING surprises me because last I saw him 2-3 years ago, he was living back home with his mother - again - and still drinkin' and being a hot azz mess (and NOT in a good way). Mark and I were together for a good 6+ years, and I always joke that I dodged a bullet when I didn't marry him because he was an abusive s.o.b. He never liked to work, didn't pay child support for his son (his mother did) and always had a reason why he COULDN'T work. My family couldn't stand him, my friends detested him and it took me 6+ years to buy a clue, ya know. That was one of the lowest points in my history. Looking back, I shake my head however it made me strong and less tolerant of azzhats in my future.

OK - back to the giggles. So, apparently he's working at Wal-Hell and turns out that Mr. I'm So Proud of My Long Hair (when really it was like a daggone brillo pad) has gone bald - up top but still has a long ponytail in the back, like he's still a metal head. Wait a flippin' minute - he's rockin' THAT look. Talk about a fashion DON'T!

Well, at least he doesn't have his crowning glory anymore. Not aging gracefully, apparently from Bec's laughter and amusement. Normally, I try to not get snarky but if you saw the hell this man put me through, including a window that I went headfirst through, you'd giggle too.

Don't worry - I won't be visiting Wal-Hell anytime soon. I might not be able to stave off a fit of giggles.

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Posted by Lys :: 5:14 PM :: 8 comments

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Monday, January 05, 2009

The Neighbor Factor...

Remember how I mentioned that I had some new neighbors move in not too long ago. Well, to be quite honest, the honeymoon is over - so so so over. There are a bunch of college "rednecks" that moved in downstairs but I'll let them continue in their partying on a Monday night. They get a pass - they just moved in on Saturday.

Anywhoo - back to the across the hall idiots. See, the gal that lived across the hall from me, Vicki, was a sweet gal - no drama, no b.s., considerate etc. The new crew that moved in - notsomuch. Apparently its a couple roommates, one that reminds me of a skinny Larry the Cable Guy with his blond "Dog the Bounty Hunter's wife" girlfriend and a Snoop Dogg/PitBull wanna be, throwin' dice on the balcony with his crew. I had to laugh when SL saw the dice game and remarked "THUGS?" More like "Wanna be perpetrators". They get an eye roll - until now because I'm pissed off.

Now, before you tell me to be nice, I have hit my threshold. I am a pretty good neighbor and the people in my building, while we have some azzhats, they are few and far between. Mostly everyone talks to each other, respects everyone's living spaces and it's a great community. Well, these new neighbors - well, they piss me off. They are loud, annoying as hell, and, the piece de resistance - they keep leaving trash outside their door. Today, even though they KNOW that the trash guy does NOT take boxes - only bags within the confines of the trash bin, they won't use the trash bin (it's on the balcony - vital for that dice game, methinks) and leave the trash and loose trash outside in the HALL -not even in the door alcove where we all keep the trash. WTH?!?! And they keep leaving boxes and cardboard. And it's not the first time, trust me on that. Well the trash guy proved a point today with leaving the boxes (which are huge) on the hall floor face down, not even propped up and these damn fools WALKED OVER THEM LIKE THEY AREN'T THERE. Next time Mr. Wiggles wants to lift his leg on 'em, I might not be so nice and let him whiz.

Wouldn't THAT be neighborly...

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Posted by Lys :: 9:14 PM :: 4 comments

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Thursday, December 18, 2008

Clearly, I'm An Idiot...

Get your coffee and sit back as the story I'm about to tell you will have you crying - with laughter that is.

Before I travel, I have a routine. 24 hours prior to flying out of Orlando, I assemble all relevant travel documents, check any upgrade availability and check in. That's mandatory. I don't need to be stressed before a flight because, as you might remember from trips past that a frazzled Lys is not one to be dealt with lightly.

So, this morning, I mosey about my normal routine of assembling everything with a quick cursory review. I called AirTran to redeem some upgrade vouchers (saving your gal some serious $$$ for fun), had a giggle with the customer service guy going "Lys, I have a note you do NOT like the first row - why don't we move you to 2A" and then I'm ready to check-in. YAY - I'm OFF TO PHILLY!

I type in my route and confirmation number only to see "Not Found."

I type in my route with my frequent flier number and, again, I see "Not Found."
WHAT THE HELL!!!!!!

I rush to pull up the email document and there it is in black and white:


December 19th - Philadelphia TO Orlando
December 21st - Orlando TO Philadelphia


Let me just say it now - children - cover your ears - SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT!

What I've always feared about doing happened. What I put out there a couple weeks ago as in "I hope I don't book this tix wrong" has happened. I need to fire that assistant of mine - namely me - because, clearly, she's an idiot.

AirTran has been lovely about this debacle, only giggling once or twice because, apparently, it does happen to others as well. At least those of us guilty of said mistake should form some sort of support group as in "People who are not allowed to book their own travel because they need to invest in a CLUE FIRST".

Keep your fingers crossed that I'll be able to head to all points snowy tundra tomorrow. The cost of my dumb mistake is pissing me off because basically, whatever money I saved via cash back, coupons and online research is pretty much paying for the change fees and airfare for the new flights. :::sigh:::

Of course Rifleman/JabberJaw is laughin' his azz off because only I would be such a dunce whose subconscious apparently thinks she's livin' in Philly and is visiting ORLANDO! Somehow I think I'll be hearing about this mishap for quite some time...

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Posted by Lys :: 5:08 PM :: 11 comments

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Friday, December 12, 2008

Riddle Me This Batman...

Why do some guys gossip worse than gals? Seriously - it can drive me batty to hear that a bunch of peeps know something before I even have time to tell them - and when I trace the origin of the "chatter", the road leads back to this cat. Well, while I adore him, I know that this little birdie one day will find his butt riddled with buckshot if he doesn't behave.

Ugh! And don't get me started with the whole "Hot/Cold" issue this pup is also guilty of.

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Posted by Lys :: 12:02 AM :: 4 comments

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Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Ulta, It's Not Me - It's You...

I've had to learn the hard way that when it comes to choosing between Ulta and Sephora, Sephora wins every. single. time.

Ulta and Sephora both sell premium beauty products, like a well stocked CVS but stocked with all things Smashbox, Jonathan Product, Too Faced and Bare Escentuals.

Now, granted - I detest the Sephora in Orlando quite frankly because Monica, the manager at the Florida Mall Sephora is what I would deem horrid. Her sales staff is just beyond rude, couldn't care less if you had a question and gossip like hens instead of waiting on customers, except for two. There are a couple girls at the store that have redeemed it out of the seventh level of hell and know the meaning of customer service.

Going to the Florida Mall is a good 30 min. out of my way. Ulta, much like Sephora, is literally 2 minutes from my house in the Altamonte Mall. Every single time I go into Ulta, I'm disappointed - with the service, the selection and the attitude. However, tonight I needed to pick up a sample size of Smashbox's Photo Finish Primer and refused to bring my big bottle because I'm stupidly attempting the carry on challenge again. (Note: Sample Size - that sucker was $17. Sample mah azz! If it didn't make my face flawless, I'd forgo the whole thing). Do I drive 45 min out of my way to the Florida Mall and back, I thought with a groan. However, I figured "Ulta has Smashbox - I'll just drop on in there". Well, like I do before ANY trip, I start browsing the aisles, trying on this, glancing at that and lo and behold not only do I have the primer but also small speakers for the iPod, travel sizes of some shampoo and conditioner that were marked $3.95 each and a couple other things.

Now, much like Sephora, Ulta has their own club - a rewards club if you will. When they first came into the Orlando area 3 years ago, I signed up. For the past TWO years, I've been bugging them to change my address to my current one and they have NOT done it. The last trip - when I picked up the Anastasia eyebrow kit - they talked me into getting a new club card for their new and improved club. When I was talking with them, they assured me it would go right in the system. Well, I didn't have my card on me tonight but figured that it was in the system.

As I'm checking out, they ring up the shampoo/conditioner - $7.00 each. I could have gotten JONATHAN for that price (well, if they carried a full product line - which they don't). I told the girl to put that crap back. She goes "Are you sure?" I told her that I would pay that for Jonathan, not some unknown name so yes I'm sure. Put. That. Back.

Total tab was about $22 so I'm mentally cursing myself out going "You should have just gone to Sephora in Holyoke, Lys. This is stupid." but I swipe my card and ask her to look up the account. The girl goes "Lys, what is your last name" and I tell her. She asks zip code and I go to give her my current one and she reads off my current address. The manager on duty looks over and goes "Nope - that's the old account". Wait a flippin' minute. WHAT? Are you telling me that AFTER I sign up for a new club account you FINALLY CHANGE MY DAMN ADDRESS.

ULTA - That's it - we're breaking up. I cursed that manager out then and there. It was bottled up for the longest so for her to come off all snotty and act basically like Monica from Sephora, I saw red. And when I saw red - I SAW RED. I told her loudly that this is why from now on Sephora will get my business because Ulta can't get their act together. She immediately throws corporate under the bus and says that it's Ulta CORPORATE not Ulta ALTAMONTE. Ummm.. nope. They both suck. And then I schooled her on what is wrong with Ulta ALTAMONTE - starting with HER.

Needless to say, Ulta you get a big FAIL in my book and, I'm not regretting this - we're breaking up for good. Don't knock on my door any more.

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Posted by Lys :: 9:15 PM :: 5 comments

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Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Like A Storyline Out of Law & Order...

Who hasn't heard about the Casey Anthony story unfolding here in Orlando? If you haven't, let me give you a quick synopsis.

Little girl goes missing, mother doesn't report it for ONE MONTH, blames a non-existent babysiter who is allegedly holding the child and gave her a "script" of stuff to say, gets arrested not once but THREE TIMES for forgery and theft, parents turn around and cajole the media left and right until the media started to get "too intrusive" (read not playing to the family), the police find evidence of decomposition in the car where Caylee was, etc. etc. etc. It's a big mess. Watch Nancy Grace - you'll get the history.

Well, the grand jury indicted her today and, IN MY OPINION [my blog, my home, my opinion] GOOD! If there is enough evidence to warrant an indictment, then my opinion (that word again) is that there has to be JUST CAUSE for her to get charged with CAPITAL murder. It is not "proof of guilt" but a finding and an accusation. She's repeated lied to law enforcement. She's shown herself to be a thief, stealing from her friend, forging checks, etc. She's had suspicious behavior from the get go and she needs to just start telling the damn truth! Now, I know she's a "mother" and someone's "daughter". Her lawyer made a point of saying that trying to make the jury pool sympathetic to her plight in yet ANOTHER press conference. However, I do not have patience for b.s.

To quote the news media, she showed more emotion today then she's shown during the whole drama. Protesters are having issues, some in support of her, some against her. You have people grandstanding for the cameras. You have attorneys that, imo, aren't out for the family but for themselves *cough cough* (and to that attorney, don't DARE tell the public that we need to "bless these people" even though they might not "pass a personality test from time to time". I'm really going to start thinking that this particular attorney has a Paris Hilton complex aka media hog).

In my opinion, the main problem is that we've lost sight of the most important thing - the child. That child needs to be found, alive or dead. The father can try to cast doubt on how, perhaps, there was "a different dead body" in the car or that it was "rotting pizza", whatever. I get that a parent doesn't want to believe that their child could have killed someone, let alone their grandchild. But what I don't get is why not just tell the truth. It's well beyond the "scared" part.

I think the first bail bondsman had a point - she's been lyin' from the beginning and now everything is starting to catch up with her. Let's just hope that the t's are crossed and the i's are are dotted and all paperwork and procedures are in order. If not, that gal is gonna be throwing holes into the whole case if the State Attorney is not careful.

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Posted by Lys :: 11:10 PM :: 3 comments

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Wednesday, September 10, 2008

One of Those...

OK, I'm apologizing to y'all in advance because what I'm about to say might be a bit offensive, or I'm about the "Flick the Bitch Switch" to quote one Rachel Zoe Project (Shush Bren! *LOL*) but I'm venting. Grab that coffee and let's chat.

This one is to the ladies. You ever have a friend - you know one of those girls - who just drives you to the brink of insanity?

Well, I have a few. Granted, now, these are friends who I've learned to use the term "friends" loosely because some things have come to light that I just have no patience, time or need for. My life has changed over the past few years - so much so, that I know there are some things I just need to cut, namely relationships with a few individuals that just frustrate me to no end. I've pulled back a few times, let some time lapse and, when I go back, it's great for a bit - then it's back to the same ol' same ol'. I have no time for that mess.

My friends are like my family and I say it often, but these girl "friends" that I speak of are like the 4th cuzzo twice removed and then some. And it got me thinking about my close friends, new friends and those I'm putting out to pasture. I noticed a trend - many of my female friends, especially those close to me, have the same mindset as I do - namely, they tend to think like men, are mature, don't tolerate b.s. and are strong women. That could explain that when you see me out and about, many of my close friends are guys and the gals with us, they can roll with the punches.

I'm an open book, upfront and to the point, sometimes blunt but that's just me. Granted, I do have a privacy meter and there are some things I don't talk about with even Bec, Meowmix or Reese. It's my business and that's that. They respect that about me and I respect that about them. You don't see guys getting all up into each other's business, do you? My male friends don't. If you wanna talk, talk. If you don't, then don't - just pass me a damn beer and call it a day.

Now, the girls that I call "Characters", well to be plain and simple, I don't trust them one iota.
  • I have little to no time for those that are judgmental, self serving, full of crap and put others down to make themselves feel better.
  • I don't have time for those that live by the "Crabs in the Barrel" mentality, i.e. if you are doing well, then they think you are "uppity", "snobby" or "arrogant" and you should be as miserable as them.
  • I don't have time for people who you can't trust with your man, not because you can't trust your man but it's THEM you have to worry about (and I speak from experience as I recently learned about a few things with my ex that just had me going "OH NO SHE DIDN'T!" Him, well nothing much surprises me about his funky behind).
  • I don't have time for people who dramatize every. little. thing and, god forbid, you might shift focus off of them for one second, then they get the "Look At Me! Look At Me!" syndrome like a rabid poodle lookin' for a scooby snack.
  • I don't have time for backbiting mess where they will smile in your face and then snipe behind your back.
  • I don't have time for those that assume b.s. and then try to pass it off as fact when, in all reality, it just shows that they really didn't KNOW you like you thought.
  • I don't have time for those people who think I should live by THEIR code and because THEY did it, I should do it too. Ummm. No. I live my life by MY rules and what is good for ME - not them. That's why their life is a whole lot of mess, drama and b.s. and I'm kinda quasi relaxed about stuff and can move down.

Plain and simple, I just don't have the time.

Not to mention, all that mess just puts out a ton of negative energy. Sure, people can be a product of their environments, but I am of the belief that you need to "rise above" and "move forward". Again, that can put me in the "is she on DRUGS" theory but, seriously, I've learned positive begets positive. You can look at the glass half empty or half full - I choose half full. Its more than what you had before, right? And, I believe that Karma is dealing with these characters just fine, as evidenced by the drama b.s. that they keep slinging.

Well, as y'all know, there's something that's going on in November and when I was chatting with Meowmix about it the other day, we had to cross some names off the list because, seriously, I don't need ANY drama that weekend. And, as Meowmix said, she doesn't need to be kickin' anyone's butt out the door - she's already got her hands full.

In the past, I always tried to make sure everyone's happy and everyone's getting along, much to the detriment of my own feelings. When I learned that some of my so-called friends pulled some so-called mess before, what's to say they won't pull that mess again. So, nope, they are C.U.T. and I feel like a HUGE weight has been lifted. I don't have to make these people happy and everyone that IS going to be there gets along fabulously. They are adults and get it.

Do I care about the characters crossed off the list and out of the address book? Not really because as Meowmix said, "With friends like that, who the hell needs enemies." I am no longer part of the "must please everyone" club and have decided that everyone is grown ass adults with grown ass adult problems, feelings and brain cells. If they can't play nicely in the sandbox, yours truly isn't going to play referee.

Plus - my friends, the ones I know who will ALWAYS have my back and won't backstab, talk crap and pull shenanigans - those are the ones that I maintain lifelong friendships with. The others, eeeehhh - their loss, NOT mine.

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Posted by Lys :: 6:05 PM :: 6 comments

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