Just Because...: The Part Where I Get Spooked...

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

The Part Where I Get Spooked...

A by-product of making the decisions that I've made recently is facing my past. And, quite simply, dealing with it. And I'm SUCH a champ at dealing with it *snort*. [Insert Sarcasm]

Ever since I was little, if I had a dream that felt so real when I woke up and remembered so vividly, I knew I had to pay attention. I like to attribute that little intuition factor to my mom's side of the fam and the ~~Indian~~ Native American side of my psyche.

I paid attention when I was 8 and had a dream about someone in our basement. 2 hours later, there was some stupid college kids in our basement (and boy did our poodle YAP - smart dog that P.J. was).

I paid attention when I had a dream about EJ that scared the beejesus out of me and, after some prodding by Meowmix, I picked up a phone after 13 years of NOT speaking with him only to find out that he was in the hospital.

I paid attention when Nicky died and had a dream where he told me "Hold out for the brass ring, Lys!" and I broke up with Mark shortly thereafter because I refused to settle.

So, a few weeks ago I had a dream where I was out with Rifleman, Meowmix and some of our crew and I get a call from Nicky. OK - ummm.. weird but I get it as I'll be with these friends on the anniversary of Nick's death and there is a bit of guilt as it's the 10th Anniversary.

Last night, tho - last night spooked me even more than the Nicky dream. I was out again with Rifleman and crew and my cell rings and on the other end is A. A. wanted to talk about my new apartment and as we're discussing the merits of the new place I found in my dream, he was supportive about my decisions and said some pretty poignant things that had me shaking my head. At first, while I was still shaky, I figured it was just a bit of residual sadness after I saw Jarhead or it was just because I'm starting to move on.

Well, before I go to sleep tonight, I figured I'd check out an online dream dictionary as now this is TWO dreams about phone calls and *boom* there it is in black and white.

Check this out:

Telephone

To see or hear a telephone in your dream, signifies a message from your unconscious or some sort of telepathic communication. You may be forced to confront issues which you have tried to avoid. Alternatively, the telephone represents your communication and relationship with others.

...

To dream that you are having a telephone conversation with someone your [sic] know, signifies an issue that you need to confront with that person. This issue may have to do with letting go some part of yourself.

So, to my subconscious, I say "Yeah, ummm.. I think I have a clue now. Now cut the crap!" And, I've also decided that Nov. will go on as planned and no decisions are being changed. I can't live my life second guessing every. little. thing.

Upwards and onwards, right?

Labels: Blog 365, Random Mess

Posted by Lys :: 10:57 PM :: 2 comments

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Just Because...

Tuesday, September 16, 2008