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Thursday, October 09, 2008

Well, the Blogging fold, at least.

I took a couple days off from the blog because, quite frankly, things are getting toxic around me and I just needed to clear my head. Sadly, I can't really detail it here but lets just say that I'm not in a good place right now. Meowmix says the first step is actually admitting it and she's right. I am looking forward to Philly (Note: Countdown - T-Minus 28 days). However, as I was told today, even a vacation is only a temporary fix to a problem that is spiraling out of control and there really is nothing to do because people need to change and I can either deal or just remove myself from the situation.

It was suggested that I find perhaps some other things to "occupy" my mind - you know, volunteer opps., etc. However, when I go to get involved in stuff around town, I'm basically advised that I need to "focus" on the 9to5 - just in case they need me. I never really get a full vacation or a sick day because something always blows up around the time that I am out of the office and, while they like to remark that yesterday I was "stressed out", what pissed me off is the fact that I was PERFECTLY FINE until the said individual created the situation and, sadly, I did lash out at a bystander who also screwed up something. I feel horribly about that (because I do indeed have a conscience) but I also don't whiny baby tattle either. I deal with the person one on one. Eeehhh - whatever. But when things go wrong, no matter WHO makes the mistake, the blame game is cast and I should have "mind read" or "thought ahead" or PLANNED for someone to make a mistake and caught it pre-mistake. What am I, the fuggin' hall monitor?? Oh puleaze! I have kept my temper at a simmer level long enough and it's close to boiling over. I just don't know if I can deal with 114 more days of this nonsense.

But one thing that apparently cheered me up inadvertently - I wore red today because I was in an evil devil sassy "don't eff with me" mood and I realized - my Phillies are playing tonight and I subconsciously wore red in support. Now let's just hope I can focus on watching my Phillies spank the Dodgers AND the CSI season premiere AND Eleventh Hour (with Marc Blucas - SQUUUUEEEEEE).

Labels: Random Mess

Posted by Lys :: 6:15 PM :: 5 comments

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